Don’t feel like going to work today? You just want to sleep, play video games and do nothing all day? All you need is a tiny little lie to sell to your boss. Here are the 20 hilarious excuses that are so ridiculous that somebody might just believe you! Maybe you’ll get away with it but we are not sure what your colleagues will think of you. That you are maybe crazy? We simply have to try the number 20!

– 1 –

My sister got kidnapped and I have to go find her.

– 2 –

I had a dream last night that I would be hit by a bus this morning.

– 3 –

I’m still drunk from last night I can’t drive to work.

– 4 –

My shrink says I need the day off.

– 5 –

You can’t handle the truth.

– 6 –

I fell into a cactus.

– 7 –

I touched a rat, I think I might have the plague.

– 8 –

Last night I had a party and I woke up with a strange man in my bed and he won’t leave.

– 9 –

I had to stay home to prepare for the zombie apocalypse.

– 10 –

My shrink put me on a new depressant yesterday and I’m feeling weird.

– 11 –

My cat hid my car keys because she gets lonesome when I’m gone.

– 12 –

Martians kidnapped my boyfriend and I have to rescue him.

– 13 –

I don’t want to lose the parking space in front of my house.

– 14 –

My wife got a bad dye job and I have to stay home to provide moral support.

– 15 –

I am sick with the Lack. Lack of ambition.

– 16 –

My spiritual guide said there will be a fire at my work today so I’m staying home.

– 17 –

I gave blood and now I’m very dizzy.

– 18 –

I was up all night because the police were investigating the death of someone discovered behind MY house.

– 19 –

My dog didn’t wake me up.

– 20 –

I won’t be in today… I’m calling in dead.

 

P.S. If you ever try any of this excuses make sure your boss has a good sense of humor. LOL

Can you remember the worst dating advice you ever got? Check out our list of 20 worst dating advice and have a good laugh!